TROUBLE CITY

It's Doctor Who, Not Doctor Him

ArticlesNick PeronComment

Who the fuck cares that Doctor Who is a man or a woman? Honestly.*

* Before you jump down to the comments section can call me an SJW, skip down to the heading to the heading "This is about appeasing the SJWs Right?" Thanks.

After enduring an African-American Human Torch, a Chinese Hulk and Super-Man, and a Muslim Ms. Marvel. Let's, not forget female Ghostbusters, Starbuck from Battlestar Galactica, Thor, and Caitlyn Jenner. After all this, why are there people who are upset over the recent announcement that the next Doctor is going to be a woman?  How is anyone surprised by this, let alone upset? I don't even watch Doctor Who and I know that there have been two references to Time Lords changing genders in series 6 and 9. How is this a shock?

The internet is rife with idiots like this:

The Secret Truth of Doctor Who

The going argument is that Doctor Who is traditionally male. Let's be honest here, Doctor Who was actually traditionally terrible. 

"CYBERMEN TRADITIONALLY HAVE AIR FILTERS ON THEIR CHEST!" - THE INTERNET

"CYBERMEN TRADITIONALLY HAVE AIR FILTERS ON THEIR CHEST!" - THE INTERNET

If you're an actual fan of Doctor Who and claim to be a "traditionalist", why stop at a male Doctor? Let's go back to the level of quality before the series was revived in 2005. Let's go back to monsters made out of sheet metal, paint rollers, and trash bags! Let's go back to every world looking like a dreary rock quarry! Let's go back to when the Doctor was a crotchety old man who was educating children on the stone age and Marco Polo! We want to be traditional, don't we?

I don't know if you've noticed, but for any franchise to survive any length it must evolve and change. If they didn't change up the cast, upgrade the special effects, and video quality, it would stagnate. Do you know why the original Doctor Who ended in 1989? Because it grew stagnant. They did a crossover with Eastenders for crying out loud. I get that it was a television special for charity, but it was the British equivalent of Jumping the Shark. The show ended performing poorly om the raitings so they canned it. Funny thing about that....

Traditionalists fondly remember the time the Doctor met the British equivalent of the Golden Girls

Traditionalists fondly remember the time the Doctor met the British equivalent of the Golden Girls

If you think the original Doctor Who is bad, unimportant, or "too old", you're not a traditionalist, so sit the fuck down, the grown-ups are talking. What made Doctor Who a great show? It certainly wasn't whether or not the Doctor had a penis or a vagina. It wasn't the budget, or the special effects. It was because of the compelling stories.

But let's talk about the real reason for these changes....

This About Appeasing the SJW's... Isn't It?

If you think this is all about appeasing SJW's, boy are you a gullible stooge. This is all about making money.

When these franchises first started, they were small, they didn't know if they were going to be money makers. Do you think Sydney Newman knew that Doctor Who was going to become a multimillion dollar franchise? Did you think Stan Lee expected Marvel Comics would become a billion dollar company? Probably not, but when they realized they were onto something, they wanted to maximize profits as much as possible.

This is going to sound incredibly cynical, but do you think Disney, the BBC, or the comic book industry are making these changes to appease SJW's? I'm surprised you think that a faceless corporation cares about anyone's feelings. Newsflash: They don't. They care about the bottom line. Sure, they hire writers and other creative talents to create these things to appeal to many groups. While these creators might genuinely care about those issues, they're only working for the company because the company thinks it will make them more money. 

You notice that the ratings are measured by TOTAL people, and makes no distinction between "whiny entitled fanboys" and "everyone else". Also, note that the season that had the lowest ratings was the one with the old white guy. Source.

You notice that the ratings are measured by TOTAL people, and makes no distinction between "whiny entitled fanboys" and "everyone else". Also, note that the season that had the lowest ratings was the one with the old white guy. Source.

When the comic book industry started, they were only worried about making enough money to keep afloat. Comic books were read and then tossed out.  A good chunk of  Doctor Who is lost to poor record keeping, because nobody at the BBC thought they were valuable.  When things started making money, they latched onto a single demographic. However, there is a glass ceiling on how much money they're making. When the SJW's -- as you like to call them -- made a huge deal about how Spider-Woman was posing on a comic book cover or the lack of female role models, and you guys pushed back, It created controversy. You ever hear of the phrase "there's no such thing as bad publicity"? Well that's what happened. You complained about something that doesn't even matter, it brought attention to these issues to people who disagree with you (as they have a right to believe) and it generated more noise. The people in marketing did some projections: Who could they make the most money off of? The smaller sampling of longtime, aging fans? Or, the much wider demographic? If they could sell their product to both genders and every ethnic demographic, they will make -- wait for it, wait for it -- more money.

Do you think they made these decisions without doing a risk analysis? They aren't losing out if you decide to leave. You aren't making a stance, they have squeezed every last penny out of you. Our culture has become a strip mine that is controlled by the whims of corporate interest. Just like every other aspect of our lives.  Becoming divisive and angry about it is not going to do anything one way or the other.

So let me ask you: If they only care about making money, why do you care what they do? It's fiction. It's not hurting anybody and it owes you nothing. If you want to champion a cause maybe pick one that actually matters. 

Comparing this to a historical event that is of consequence. Nobody remembers the name of the guy who got Rosa Parks arrested for refusing to sit at the back of the bus. The only thing written about him was an obituary. Most people who read that obit probably said: "man what an asshole." and went about their day. People are going to even less of give a crap about you, the guy against a female version of a make believe character. 

At The End of the Day...

Enjoy entertainment for entertainment's sake. Not for what a character looks like. If the stories don't interest you, then find something else to enjoy. 

You’re going to miss everything cool and die angry.
— Patton Oswalt



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