Doomsday Reels: Prehistoric Bimbos in Armageddon City

Prehistoric Bimbos in Armageddon City (1991)

The Director

Todd Sheets

The Actors

Holly Starr (Gabrielle), Matthew Lewis (Larry - The Male Bimbo), Veronica Orr (Doc), Charles Monroe (John Apollo), Robert Vollrath (Nemisis), Deric Bernier (Salacious Thatch), Todd Sheets (Pringle)

The Cause

Chemical Warfare

The Story

"IN THE FUTURE........ A GROUP OF FEMALE WARRIORS FOUGHT A HUGE BATTLE IN ARMAGEDDON CITY....... NOW A NEW EVIL HAS ARRIVED...... THE ADVENTURE BEGINS AGAIN......" - opening text

The Rundown

Bimbos B.C. is a nigh-unwatchable shot on video film made for approximately the price of a ham sandwich and one of those mini-cans of store brand cola. Despite it's deep and innumerable limitations, there's a certain low-fi pleasure to watching the movie that transcends so bad its good. It's a plucky little "lets put on a show" movie that you can appreciate on the level that somebody probably did a lot of work that totally didn't pay off but what the fuck have you done? How many movies did you shoot on your camcorder in the early 90s? Huh?

Prehistoric Bimbos in Armageddon City is a direct sequel to Bimbos B.C. that picks up a short time after the first film, which is summed up in a hodgepodge of scenes from the first film that is presented without comment or context. Shortly afterward we pick up back at Bimbo H.Q. where Trianna, the heroine of the first movie is off doing something or other so she's left Gabrielle (Holly Starr) in charge in her stead.

As plot-light as the first movie was, this one is even more aimless. The bimbos head off to rent some robots to mine from gemstones only to find that the robots have been stolen by an evil warlord named Nemisis who has taken over Armageddon City after the death of Salacious Thatch in the first movie. In a twist, Nemisis find's Thatch still alive and gives him a robot arm so that he can exact his revenge on the bimbos for the events of the first movie.

The bimbos wander around aimlessly, dispatching mutants of various low-budget goofiness and then briefly fight Thatch until Nemisis just gets tired of Thatch and they have a long ridiculous fight scene and the movie ends. Also, Todd Sheets reprising his roll as Pringle, ostensibly comes to help the Bimbos which actually takes the form of wandering aimlessly around a parking garage for ten minutes and not interacting with any other characters until the very end.

This movie is every bit as shoddily assembled as its predecessor but there are several improvements that need to be addressed. Wardrobe is still nonsense, the bimbos are still wearing normal street clothes with random bits of faux-fur attached to make them look cave-woman and Thatch still looks like a half-hearted LARP-weirdo but this movie actually does have props. Thatch's robot hand is easily the best propr but there are some actually decent attempts at set-dressing, and the low-fi dryer-vent and random car parts clad robots are lovably cheesy. Similarly the mutants are a vast improvement over the first film's guy in a school mascot suit. They're still clearly made on the cheap but they resemble actual creatures this time.

This movie has a better sense of humor than the first. Tone-deaf line delivery still steps on a lot of the jokes but some of the sight gags built around the film's acknowledgement of its goofy nature work decently. There's a pretty entertaining gag at the end where Nemisis and Thatch have a chase scene that involves them going from cars to bicycles to skateboards, basically slap-fighting the whole way.

Prehistoric Bimbos in Armageddon City is a marked improvement over its predecessor and it's got a lot of charm and pluck but it's still a pretty abysmal movie on its face. It's almost watchable but most of my appreciation of it comes from the fact that it's better than the first. It's super hard to find anyway so there's no good reason to seek this movie out anyway but there are worse ways to spend an hour and ten minutes.

There is a third Bimbos movie, Bimbos in Time, but as hard as it was getting hold of the first two, it's basically impossible to find the third so that ends my coverage of this particular franchise for now.

The Shill

Prehistoric Bimbos in Armageddon City is available as part of one of those bargain-bin 50 movie packs but it is also out of print so the amount of money you would have to pay to watch what amounts to a shitty VHS transfer will never be worth your trouble.